Shocking Teej…!!!!

Hi People this a very random shot that came in my mind and though i will give a shot. I dont know how its gona shape up but i will tell you it is no where related to my story Life without her. I am yet to update chapter 5 as i feel more has to be written in that. Now coming back, lets see how this is going to be.

Raizada mansion, 5:30pm

Anjali Shyam Jha was busy checking all the arrangements for the night pooja and their temple visit. She cross checked whether all their thali’s, flowers and sweets that were to distributed as prashad were arranged in order so as hari prakash aka hp can load them in the two cars in which they are about to travel by 6:00pm. Once when sure, she ordered the same to hp feeling satisfied. At that moment the door of the house opened to reveal two of the most lovable males of the family, shyam jha her husband and akash her cousin brother.

Anjali pouted sadly and this was the scene welcomed akash, the moment he entered inside the house he knows he is about to be bombarded by thousand question in next ten minutes. Usually the loyal brother he is to his beloved brother Arnav Singh Raizada aka ASR, today he is thinking about it, actually debating is the right word after the behaviour of his brother for past two months. The usually arrogant, rude absurd brother is all the more different at office but he is nor able to figure out the difference though. He solomenly swear that he even see his bhai smile little often nowadays, a cleat change in that has to be informed to his sister. Thus the laxman of the ASR is going behind his back today.

Anjali: Where is chote Akash??

Akash: Di he is busy asusual with work or atleast that’s what he told me.

Anjali: What do you mean by this akash?

Akash: Actually di, I wanted to tell you something for quite sometime but was not sure. I think now i see my doubts are right and here am about to confess the same.

Shyam: wah akash, you speak as though you are suspecting something. Now before our imaginations go wild please enlighten us. said his beloved jeejaji.

Akash: Actually Di and Jeejaji, bhai is behaving very weird these days. Meaning there is no much work these days but he dines out stating business dinners, he smiles in the middle of the conferences, At the maximum no shouting at staffs and mainly he i feel day dreaming most of the time.

Shyam and Anji and Mami: What???????!!!

Akash: Yup di and when asked about Aman he is tight clipped about it and told me in no nonsense tone that he doesn’t know anything. Still i feel he knows everything.

Mami: Investigation karega padi!!!

Shyam: Haan mamiji.. Saale shab and with all these deficiencies means he is in love? or some weird diease?

Anjali: Mami is right but now we need to read temple on time so lets get going with that and i will talk to chote about it tonight.

Saying this anjali went to call nani as it was time. Meanwhile everyone assembled in the hall and started to the temple.

What they didnt know was the whole Raizada family is going to have a heart attack and going to become a raita sooner!!!

Gupta’s house, 5:45pm

Kushiiiii!!!! Just get ready fast will you?? Payal will be reaching with her husband Rohit anytime.This is her first teej and you dont want to make your jeejai wait right? also your favorite Arnavji right? He will be here in another 5 mintues shouted garima, mother of kushi facing the closed room, which was closed for almost 40minutes now.

Buaji: Hai re nandhkishore!! Parameswari come out fast and help us. I dont know what Arnav bitwa saw in her.

With that the door opened to reveal the gorgeous Kushi in his favorite red saree, gifted by him yesterday.

Kushi: He is as much as crazy like me buaji and thats what made us together now satisfied? I have to run to temple as he called just now that he already reached temple as his sister as called him to ask his where abouts. So before next call comes he needs to leave this place to find out which temple the raizadas are heading too.

Amma can i go?

Amma: will you be here kushi when you know the atheist of your to be husband is at temple waiting just for you with that famous anger on his dancing on his nose? Go go!! i will accompany payal. Make sure arnav bitwa eats something before he leaves as i very well know he would have kept the fast with you.

Kushi smiled hearing this and said sure sure and left to laxmi nagar temple to meet her beloved Rajkumar waiting for her at the temple, reliving her past 6 months of life.

Yeah kushi had joined AR group of fashion designer and a junior designer and also as CEO’s PA. It was love at first sight for her eventhough ended up yelling at each other as both were scared at their magnitude of feeling for each other. It took them almost 4 months of pushing and pulling to make them understand that it was a lost cause for both of them as they are irrevocably in love with each other. Now she is dating her boss for past two months, if she has to put it in his way. The love between them has increased exponentially in these two months still these two months seems just two days for her. The great ASR has bent on his knees in front of her to claim her as his. This thoughts still send goosebumps in her full body. Since she has initially resisted to this proposal, the angry young man approached her family for the approval which he has availed it with his single time buttering. So  now it has become arnav bitwa this, arnav bitwa that with her family as well. When i asked about introducing me to his family he has resisted it stating that he need some more time to enjoy this secrecy as telling his family means immediate marriage but he wanted atleast 6 months of courtship period to enjoy with her before matrimony. That was the promise he has given to shashi gupta, the man with high morals has accepted this for the reason which kushi is unknown to. May be he saw the sincerity in arnav’s eyes. She reached the temple to see a 6 inch tall well built man standing leaning on the bonnet of his car, who removed his avaitors looking at her.

Same time on the opposite side of the road, two raizada’s car stopped at the front of the temple. Anjali, mami, nani, akash and shyam got down from the car and moved to the bonnet to retrive the things that are to be used in the temple. Taking everything they moved towards the temple, that is when  shyam’s eyes rested on the familiar SUV that was parked few cars away and a man standing with his sleeves rolled up, blazer and jacket removed, leaning casually on the car.

Shyam: Anjii, did you tell your brother where we are heading to when you called few minutes back?

Anji: No shyam but why?

Shyam signalled her with his eyes, meanwhile the whole family stopped hearing the conversation and came to a fluid stop viewing in the direction shyam has signalled. To tell Anji was shocked was a understatement. Her mouth has taken a wide O along with her eyes popping out of its socket. The same was the case with whole family. Shyam broke them out of their revive and told them that lets approach him. They took few more steps in front and reached to the hearing distance when they again came to stop with their jaw dropping expression as a vision in red came near arnav, catched his hand and ushered him towards the temple.

Akash: Kushi kumari Gupta???????????

Suddenly he smiled, this explains kushi’s late night stay at office too..

Anji: Do you know her akash?

Akash: Obviously di, she is kushi, junior designer and also his PA.

Shyam: I think this pretty much explains everything is in it?

Anjali: Yeah but why didnt chote tell us? I feel he is actually so serious about her. Lets go behind them and find out. I warn everyone, means everyone that noone should come in front of chote till he leaves this place. Got it? since the cat is out of the box now, we will make him confess at our home and not here.

To this all agreed and all started walking behind the couple in safe distance, since the temple was crowded for aarti ASR and kushi didnt know that they were been followed.

Arnav: Man she is gorgeous. hope i survive this torture of not touching her as its a temple. Hmm kushi what kept you so long?

Kushi: Arnavji i was getting ready actually. it become little long to find the matching accessories.

Arnav: Ho!!

Kushi: Now since you have to go soon shall we start?

Arnav: Sure

Once getting his nods, kushi started the pooja then arnav fed her with water and sweet. She took a bite from it and pushed the rest to arnav’s mouth who had by now had raised his eyebrow in question.

Kushi: Now dont look at me like that, i know you kept fast too. I dont know when you will realise that its dangerous as you are diabetic.

Arnav: I will not stop it till you stop kushi so the question is a lost cause.Now since everything is over can i call di? I had told her another lie that am in a meeting. she will kick me sooner or later.

Kushi: yeah yeah you can but before that lets sit on the bench and lets have something together and then you leave. since you told you are not coming amma gave a box of poori and aalo sabzi for us so that you can be healthy for some more time.

Arnav: This was not needed kushi.

Kushi: Do you really think i had a say in this? Also arnav she is right so donot argue with KKG and come now.

Saying this she pulled a pouting arnav to the nearby bench and fed him with her hands while he was busy texting someone. There in a corner of the temple 5 different souls were breathing harder as it got catched some where near their throat. All their eyes where wide open not to miss any action that is happening in front of them.

Once done with sharing and eating the couple walked down the stairs of the temple to bump into another couple none other than Rohit and Payal. The ease with which arnav spoke to both knocked the remaining lives of the raizada’s leading to an unknown ache settling in anjali’s chest along with this happiness.

Anji: Chote is totally different here but why didnt he share his relationship with us? are we that bad?

Shyam: Ranisaiba!! nothing like that i think he need some time to tell us thats it.

Anji: But i feel the people in the girls family know him but then why not us?

Akash: I think its time we confront bhai then?

He spoke as he saw the retreating figure of his bhai and kushi, who got into the car and drove off unknown to the strom that will brew in shantivan tonight.

Anji: Yeah you are right akash, also i think we will talk little with this couple too and befriend them to know better..

By the time she spoke this 3 more people joined the couple making up a family. All the raizada’s looked at anjali whose eyes shown with determination to get into the roots!!!


No proof read!! please do comment and tell me how it was! also do tell me if there is anything that needs to be changed. Also am not planning this to continue as am confused what to do? will i ever get an appreciation for my writing. If you feel i need to finish this off do drop in your suggestion.. please dont forget to like!!!



Planning on a come back.

Hi to all my friends. I know I have been very unfair with you all people by taking more than a necessary break of about an year and half. First of all I thank all the hearts who have waited patiently with me and who have concluded that I will not continue anymore.
Secondly I wanted to share the reason behind my long absent. My mom was struggling from the most cruel diease of the world cancer, and she lost the battle to it for forever very recently.  So I was triple time busy for the last one year. Hope you all understand.  Please keep me in your prayers to provide me the strength to come out of this biggest loss. Losing MOM..!!!!
Thirdly please do comment whether I want to continue life without her or shall I leave it like that. Am not going to send pm’s to anybody to know the response, but if I get even one single reply I will start posting it. Just an assurance that people are there out for me.. chapter 5 is already in pipeline.  I will finish this story soon and start one more too. But yeah I promise I will be regular from now on..
“Awaiting your response friends”….

Big Big Break and before that a small precap of chapter 5

Precap, Chapter 5: Flashback

Kushi was sitting in the porch waiting for her kids to turn back so that she can have dinner with them,
She then as always started thinking about her dreadful day and how she is today and what a strong woman she has become to face the society. She never want to remember it all but still it is a fresh nightmare for her again and again. Only if her arnavji would have returned, only if she had not been the victim again. if and only…..



Two months after joining in the new home she was on her way back after her english classes that she take from her school staff along with whom she works

Kushi swayed and her eyes blurred and she was pushed to sit on the side if the road…..

Doc: congrats kushi you are pregnant.

Kushi: ????


J: you want to keep this child?

K: yes ma.

J: then i will support you totally. Dont worry.

To continue…

MEMORIES- First Love

The Road Not Taken


Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;


Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,


And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.


I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
I was walking aimlessly on a rainy drizzling day on a road opposite to my school covered with buildings on my both sides with trees on the front of the houses, creating a serene divine mood. I was staring straight at my school front gate and i suddenly got remembered of my nine years and two more years in that school. “My second home”. I looked up the sky slowly to see they were covered with dark clouds indicating that they may pour any moment. That was the moment which pulled me in remembering my childhood days or say those old school days. They brought back many memories that are to be cherished and lived on. The walls of the school had seen me growing up in a better way than anyone else or should i say that my school grew up along with me.
I still remember my mother telling me that it was two and half year after i had born the school was started. I did my initial kg’s in the very same school and later i joined back  in my fourth standard, i still remembered the entrance i took, the way the principal asked me questions and then admitted me in the school. I remembered the way my 4th & 5th standard friend becoming a pen friend to me, to whom am still friend with. I remembered all the pranks i played on my friends and the punishments i shared with them. I remembered many fights, scolding each other, shouting at each other, creating differences, making wrong assumptions, etc etc etc. It brought a small smile on my lips to think how funny i and my friends were. How much we have missed. I still remember one of my 4th standard friend who ate safety pins. chalks, springs just because he like them. I once heard that he like inks too. I remembered my crazy and shrewd acts to escape punishments. I remembered my passionate hating towards my social teacher. Many more as it goes. Remembering all these i reached the front door of my school. I have to take left for my home.
It was then i suddenly remembered the words of my English teacher about “the road not taken” poem in her sweet, clear English accent. The Poem that had touched a particular string of my heart. I stood in front of my old school, taking myself back to those sweet and beautiful memories of the road i had not taken. Better say a part of my heart wish that i had taken. It was again on a moody day of my tenth standard class when boys football team was playing the semifinal match for their respective house teams that i laid my eyes on him first. (I never knew when he saw me first still as i never had a opportunity to talk to him in first place till now.) My team was playing against the opponent team, so i was watching the match from front of my class in third floor, by pulling a bench out of my class with my classmates help and sitting on it for a clear view. It was rather a crucial moment win when i saw him hitting a goal in the penalty shoot out as my team member did a mistake and i had a instant hating towards him. “Experts now say hating someone leads you towards a passionate love”. If only i had known this concept then i would not have tried it. Obviously his team had won that time due to his goal and the whole 12th std and 10th std batch girls were head over heels on him, for his kick and all were behind him. Expect our house members of 10th std students (12th std people loved him anyways as he was his classmate) who were angry against him and also sad  for losing the opportunity for the house cup. It was then i first called (named) him White Pig in front of my friends. I never knew our paths are going to be crossed again and again and i never knew still when my hatred changed to infatuation and then to first love ( Sounding Funny to even me)
I saw him two days later crossing me so closely to attend a common lecture. He brushed past me and i was electrically charged and was rooted in the same spot for a minute before my friend brought me back from my  reverie. All through the lectures the staring sessions were on. My adrenaline rush got best out of me and all my anger towards him disappeared like a puff of smoke with my one look in his eyes. Eyes that can create a havoc in your life and the looks that could kill.
Days started to move very soon with all staring and him smiling and  my shocking wide eyed expressions. Whenever he goes for a break with his class friends he used to peep into my class just to see my blushing smile. In Bhajans and other places where 10th and 12th std should be together, we used to talk through our eyes and assure through our smiles. Blending of my blushes along with adrenaline rushes made my days delightful and wanting. I started looking forward for the nights to end and days to come soon. Sooner even the dreams were filled with joy and happiness of the day events making them beautiful too. Soon my friend learnt my crazy carvings for him and she took it one step further by showing me his home which was there in the end of my school road. I was still more delighted to watch him now and then when i cross his place to my friends house which was on the opposite end of the main road. 
Few memories are still etched in my heart that it cant be easily removed. I remembered once during lunch i was about to bump into him almost as i was thinking and walking with his memories, I straightened myself in the right moment and i lifted my head to see him staring at me concerned with a small smile on his lips and hands in the air ready to catch me in the right moment. I was about to say sorry but words got stuck in my mouth and i was blushing profusely and i felt that he learned my little secret of thinking about him as his lopsided smirk appeared on his beautiful face. I was embarrassed that i left the place in hurry without even telling a sorry but  shamelessly thinking about his lips and his smirk. huh!!! I was hyperventilating in the restroom for 5 minutes with my hand over my heart to reduce its beating and butterflies fluttering in my stomach relaying that smirking face of his. I remembered the very next day after the school ended i was having my cycle key rotating in my hand when it suddenly landed on the floor making me to bend and pick it up. Just near my keys i saw suddenly a pair of shoes appearing  out if thin air and i lifted my head to see him standing in front of me with his same lopsided smirk, teasing me in front of my friends and reminding me silently about previous days almost bump. I saw him flanged between his two class mates who were laughing silently along with my friends who were behind my back. Out of all this i realized that he just ran and stood in front of me when he saw me bending just to tease me. He was teasing me! Grrrrrrrr….!!!
I still remembered how i panicked every single day when he doesn’t turn up to school and always found him standing in front of his gate to assure me. I still remembered how he used to come late every single day in the morning hour just to get sweet scoldings from all the staff. Even all the teachers were with him and they never scold him for anything. He created a charm around every person who laid their eyes on him. Sooner he became my lucky charm and he was everything i wanted in my life at that time. 
I remember once when standing and talking to my tamil teacher once infront of the staff room with my friend i saw him walking into the school gate from third gate with a kid holding his hand. I asked my friend to know about the kid and later i found that was his relative’s ( may be even step mom) kid.  I also found on the same day that he lost his mother when he was young and that’s the reason that teachers were never angry on him but on opposite they handle him politely. He was always my lucky charm from then as when i start something after seeing him it would end in success. That day my talk with my tamil teacher went well too and all my test’s for the day got cancelled. I started getting more addicted to him. I felt he removed my pain with his look and became my strength in all necessary times. At the same time days started running fast. Evenings i will make sure i see him before i leave home ( he had other classes to attend in school itself). Weekends i used to pass buy his house for my Math tuition to get his glimpse and also will search for him on roads and i was never disappointed. I remembered those fearless days of mine.
I remember him speaking to the speaker during some lecture about importance of money in life and he just left the place later. Once when the sir was going out her called one of the student for something, he pointed at me only but i was lazy enough to move from the place so i sent my friend only later to realize that the speaker wanted me to call him. I hated myself for missing one opportunity to talk with him. once the lecture got over he was again behind me with his friends till the cycle stand talking little loudly and demanding water from one of his friends sister and sweet talking to her to make me jealous. This day was another memorable day of my life that i had spent with him. i even saw him in my near by temple once, where he stood so close to me brushing my side while praying and thus creating a natural vibration in me. That was some auspicious day and that day marked another milestone in my life as i thought Devimaa just checked us together. That day too his eyes never left mine in the crowd. 
I remembered once during a rainy day that i was late to school in the morning (for some special class) , I parked my cycle in cycle stand and was rushing towards my class when i felt eyes on me and immediately figured out that it was his eyes. I searched for him and sooner found out him in a jula in the park waiting for me to look at him. We smiled at each other so politely and sooner his smile turned to smirk as i got hit by a tree trunk that was in my way. Then i rushed to my class while hearing his sweet laughter coming behind from me. As i was late my tamil miss didn’t allow me to step inside the class and this was seen by him. It was the first day that he was angry at me for coming to school late. Uff still i remember the steam from his eyes. I apologized to my miss soon before the prayer started by telling my reasons for coming late which was seen by him. That finally made him relax a little. Few days later during an another rainy day i saw him bunking his experts classes and coming and standing behind me while i was waiting for my mother under a shade of a classroom. That was the same day my mother asked about him to me and i spoke to about him to my mom (Just imagine). Then My birthday came and i wore a color dress (Blue with peach color) and i was staying silently in my class not to seek attention. But as always his friends saw me and went back to him to tell him because of which he came rushing to me. I remembered how cool that day was and i also saw him coming behind me that day evening when i was on the way to math class. On his Diwali i remember him wearing a peach shirt. 
Successfully my syllabus were completed and a series of test for one and half month were planned by the school management for tenth and twelfth standard. That was the start of my fear for two things. One to do well in my exam and two not to miss him. I was not able to concentrate much on the second part though. Time was flying past us and we exchanged many more sweet memories like this. Corridor studies for the exams, changing the places and sitting just to watch each other, Walking with my friend in the evening, with him walking in front of us or him walking with his friends and me stalling behind him. Very sooner my one and half month tests got over and all were busy with marks and improving themselves, and preparing for the next few test that were lined up after this but i was really sad that he was sad about something. I even watched his friends consoling him twice but i never intended to talk to him (Wish i had done)
Then came the tour with few students backing out due to some issues including me. Those days were the most torturing days for me without seeing him. Only if i had known i will never see him again for life very soon. I wished and prayed for his well being daily or even for every hour daily for those three days till i saw him in flesh infront of my eyes on monday following the trip. I was thinking the whole time whether he remembered me even once during the trip. For this question still i don’t have answer myself. But i sooner learnt that all of them enjoyed nicely and i was satisfied that that’s all i want. Again the exam writing started and afternoons were passed with reading for the next exam. It was one day like that when i was reading for my exams and he was passing by me i realized that many teachers in my school got to know about us. That scene still plays in my head clearly. Two teachers were sitting beside me in bench and were correcting paper. This guy who was passing me suddenly stopped next to me and spoke to my class mate something unreasonable, as always i started all smiling and things that my economics teacher as him to vacate this place with all smile in her face and looking at me. He was adamant for a moment that she literally threatened him to vacate the place which he did with all smiles stealing glances of me. I was confused for a moment or so until i saw my miss controlling her laugh by tightening her lips and by shaking her head. I was embarrassed again. Few days later similarly when i was reading i saw him walking out of the rest room with his friends, he winked at me killing me at the same time and wholeheartedly laughed seeing my shocked expression. I turned wildly around both sides to release my breadth after i confirmed that none looked at us. At the same day he gave me second time heart attack by wolf whistling one of the kollywood number (Kaadhalikkum aasail illai song) during lunch period and took me by surprise (surprise because he don’t know tamil). From then on he never left me alone, even if i hide from him to read peacefully he will come in search of me and make my heart flutter or he would do something funny and will make me shocked all the time. This moved on and finally public practical examinations came. I was anxiously waiting for him once his first exam(physics) and i saw him coming back all gloomy and sad. I didn’t know what went wrong but just prayed he did well. I also remember how he started maintaining his distance from me and all eye talking were suddenly stopped. Farewell day was another bland event. He came late in the morning and we all started for temples and we prayed for good results and i think in two places he was standing just behind me his face all serious, once we returned back we had lunch and then some talk of motivations were going on but i never took my eyes on him. Farewell day ended peacefully and we all left back home after that. I never took it seriously as i thought it was just exam stress.  Soon exam started and he completed his exams before mine and soon mine ended too. I went on the last day of my exam only to be dissapointed that he was not there waiting for me like usual. My whole tenth holidays passed by me choosing the same stream as his and same language as his. I kept waiting and praying to god but all my prayers went in vain. My school for 11th started and i made all new friends and were all busy telling them my history geography and one evening he suddenly popped out of thin air from behind a car where he was supposedly hiding to catch a glimpse of me. I shouted to my friends that its him and those shameless idiots started gawking over him in the middle of the road stopping their vehicle. They were all swooned by his appearance. I still remembering him wearing a yellow color small checked shirt with the lines white in color. I saw him smiling with his head bent down and walking slowly towards us and i made these girls to leave the place immediately as they were making the situations difficult for me. I was finally happy after a long time to know that he is back in town and walked the way back in the drizzling rain singing and dancing all the way from where my friends left me till my home. My happiness however short lived as  he never turned back after that, how much ever i tried to get a glimpse of him. Few more months passed in blur with his memories in my heart. I prayed wholeheartedly to God to just seeing him once and confirm that he was fine. I remember that day very well when the floor from devi’s hand feel down granting my wish, and i know i will see him soon.
January 2006 and i was on my way back home with my parents flanged on either side on me (one on bike and other on cycle & me in another cycle) night 8’o clock, Like usual i peeped inside his house to see his pale and tired face with a untidy hair and a drowsy and frightened eyes staring back at me. i was crossing his place and all happened so quickly for me to realize anything, I saw him on a red chair though and still today i don’t know whether it was really him or not. That was the last time i saw him.
Loud thunder brought me back to the present, I realized i was still standing in front of my school with a painful face. I slowly took  a left and started walking raising my head and looking at the sky to check whether i can make home before it rains heavily with lot of thoughts in my mind. It been eight years since i last saw him but still the memories associated with him are fresh in my mind. I have gotten over him for sure in this past years but few questions still remain the same. Why didn’t i try talking to him once? how my life would have been if he was there in my life? why hadn’t he approached me even once? Did he tried playing with my feelings? what was he so worried about during the last days? why haven’t he once comeback from where ever he went? Will i ever see him once in future? Had he got married himself? will we talk suppose if we met? Will i recognize him? will he recognize me? would it be painful or funny? would we talk? Ufff never ending questions. With this as usual i turned to left when i reached the end of the road to see a clinic name board standing the front of the same house where he used to live one. Where his memories are living now. I nodded my head slowly thinking that i took the road less traveled (being a teenager that time it was common to fell in love with and create problems in life, but i never did that as i took a lot of time to remove the pain of loosing him hence i diverted myself with other things in life) and i will reach my success slowly and steadily, so there is no point in worrying about the road not taken.
Thank you all for patiently putting up with this story. I have two more like this to write, So once am done with this i will update my story that is pending for a very long time. If time permits i will try giving a short update there too! If things goes well. Do like and drop in your comments taking your little time so as to help me in improving me writing and also motivating me with your words. All your comments are my motivations so please take some time and tell me how it was.
Also i didn’t proof read so please ignore typo’s

chapter 4 The Game Plan ( Life without Her)

Aashi was still paralyzed while aansh realized and came out of the trance at once and saw again the man’s face.

He was very pale, full of dark circle under his eye, the skin below his eyes were little wrinkled indicating his sleepless night’s. He was over all still lean and the cheek bones little predominant on his face. His stubble was not there as though he just shaved today. On the whole aansh can realize that he was suffering but why? that he has to find! he doesn’t know anything about his dad but he does know that the man standing in front of him is his dad!!

He saw that arnav has not taken his eyes off his sister and realized at the same time what was he remembering, His mom!! Eventhough he doesn’t know anything but he never wanted his mom to be revealed soon!! His little ASR brain worked and he directed his speech to this man!

Aansh: Sir! sorry for shouting at you earlier but you know i cant help it when my sister is hurt. Mumma always says that we should respect elders but i am sorry that i shouted at you.

This chatter made aashi out of her trance and she closed her mouth immediately, at the same time arnav lifted his eyes from aashi to aansh. The moment he turned his thoughts and was about to say a” no problem”, he met a twinkling pair of hazel eyes of the boy and was drowning in those same eyes that he missed for almost 8 full years!

But both of them are very clever and quite understandable so aashi said,

Aashi: Sorry to mein puchana thi! so sorry sir i didnt see you coming and please forgive my bhaiyu too!

And she added a cute smile that left arnav reeling. They both saw that arnav was lost and thought better to leave as their excitement was soaring up in the air. Their father was here finally and they would find out more soon!! They are not ASR’s for nothing. Aashi thought i think there ia more adventure left for this holiday and smiled a known smile at her brother.

They turned around when they heard a soft “wait” from arnav. Almost a muffled and a lost one. Both looked at each other meaning fully before turning their faces to arnav.

Aansh:  Yes sir.

Arnav: Even i have to say sorry in that matter kids. Even i didn’t see you guys. Actually i was searching for someone and i forgot to look front too.

(Again an eye lock between the twins)

Aansh smiled and said : Its okay sir we understand. You might have been in a hurry.

Aashi: Sir do you need our help sir? You seems to be new here?

arnav smiled at aashi and then looked at both and asked

Arnav: What is your name? both of you?

Aansh: Sorry sir but mumma has said we should not talk personal matters to a stranger even if its just names in that matter.

Arnav raised his eyebrow, then furrowed it in concentration and thought something and said in a low serious voice,

Arnav: Yeah kid your mumma is right and am Arnav singh raizada, CEO of AR industries. and telling just your names wont do any harm i feel, is in it?

Arnav was wondering while talking to these kids that what on the earth was he doing here? He came in search of kushi and he is socializing with some two random kids of this school, just because they have some traits of kushi! but his heart felt right, he knows that he is doing the right thing in knowing these kids, he can see himself relaxing and he can see a change coming, real one.

So he extended his hands waited while the twins exchanged a known glance once more before aansh extending his hand towards arnav.

Aansh: Hello arnav sir, am aansh doing my third standard “a” section and this is aashi my twin sister, studying in the same class as me. we just got our results for 2nd and books for 3rd std today and we are living near by. anything else you want?

Arnav laughed at the last sentence as he can see the kid is little worked up so he said he came here to meet the HM of the school. Arnav was not thinking in that way till he mouthed it to these two kids. but at the same time his eyes were recording every moment of these two little kids. He also realized something more important, the boy has hazel eyes while the girl has carmel orbs ( same as his)

AAshi’s and aansh’s eyes widened hearing that!! They realized what he may want to talk to HM but they also became happy that their HM was not there here for now. They know everything about their HM maam, Jeniffer as she was almost like a granny. Thats what they used to call her. Jenny granny at home!! mom has ordered only at home ant not in school and they have accepted that.

Aashi: Arnav sir, Our maam is not in town for now, she will be back next weekend only. meaning next sunday. You have to wait till that!!

Arnav: OH!!!!!!!


Meanwhile kushi was there already panicking about her kids. she was preparing question paper for 10th and 12th students as they will have school even during the termly holidays as the portions have to be covered. Yeah she was taking hindi from 8th std to 12th std students as she mastered hindi literature with the help of jenny maam. She also speaks english fluently and handle some kg classes whenever she is free as she finds happiness with kids. Apart from that she handle maths for 4th and 5th std students. She supports her family quite well with the help of jenny maam.

She was already worried that school gets over for her two kids by next wednesday and they have a long leave for almost two months! she don’t know how she is going to manage both of them as they are little grown up’s now and she cant leave them in amylo’s (children care taking center), which means she has to find some alternatives. She was also worried about how much matured these two are and they will ask her to leave them alone at home, telling they will take care of themselves. Even though her home is near to school she cant check them often so she has to thinking something soon and put it into action.

She looked up the clock and frowned a little seeing the time is going to be 3:30 and these two naughty little kids haven’t reached her cabin still. She was doubting as what was holding them now. usually school starts at 7:45 am and ends at 2:45 pm here. They will usually come by 3, leave their bags and will play in the school ground till she finish off her work and comes and call them. It has been two weeks since they started their 3rd standard. Today they said that they will be little late as they are going to get their books but this long? She started panicking already and was thinking about to go and check herself.

(On the other side, here the conversation continues)

Arnav was thinking now what he is going to do, then he decided that he is going to stay here for sometime whatever may happen. something is stopping him then he is going to stop himself.

Arnav: Okay little girl, Then i will come here after a week may be.

Aansh: Sure sir. You can! all upto you! if you need anything u can find us in the near by park which is where we play. Now bye! our mamma will be searching and we need to go.

Arnav felt like he has to come here daily just to meet these two kids and by coming here he can find some information about kushi before he meets the HM next monday!! He said a small bye to these two kids and left the premises at the same time these two made sure that he left.

When they turned back they saw kushi standing behind them and they got scared for a second that may be she saw.

Kushi: What are you two staring at? An empty road? any idea to start home or not?

They both sighed and looked at each other and said together. “No mom,and aansh continued, Just saw a new Car so was seeing it”

Kushi smiled at her children and went to home with them. Once they reached home, both of them went to their room and looked at each other.

Aashi: Daddy!!

Aansh: Papa!!

They mouthed at the same time.

Aansh: we cant talk about anything here chotti so we will do our homework soon and go to park and continue.

Aashi accepted this and both refreshed, had their boost and snacks and wrote their homework and finished it off soon.

aashi: Mom, its just 4: 30 mom.

Kushi: yes sweet heart, so?

Aansh: Ask directly chotti, mumma me and chotti want to go to park and play as it is friday today and we have two days to read for our monday class test.

Kushi: Hmmm so this was what chotti wanted to do tell haan.. Let me think. she was watching those two little faces who was watching her expectantly.

Then she was like okay but just one and half an hour cuteys. You should be here by sharp 6. Else no playing for the next two day. What say?

Aashi & Aansh: Yes Mom!!

They rushed outside and reached to their favorite bench and started thinking.

Aashi: You thinking what i think bhaiyu? Papa here, what for? and he looks very…

Aansh: Tired chotti. thats how he looks but my doubt is, is he here for mom? it looks like that only, but i dont want him near my mom.

Aashi: Bhaiyu why you talk like this? always mom told not to talk like that about papa na.

Aansh : But didn’t you see how she cries every time, we question her something about papa or our family members?

Aashi: Yeah bhaiyu but we know nothing about them, didnt always mumma taught us that we should not come to any conclusion before knowing them? We have to do something soon and we have one week bhaiyu, do u realise that?

Aansh: Haan chotti!! So we have two things to do, One knowing the past of papa and mama, for that we have to again try talking to mom without hurting her and second knowing about papa and if he really wants to meet mumma and without making her cry.

Aashi: Do you think papa will come to meet us again bhaiyu?  we told him if anything he can meet us here but will he come?

Aansh: Don’t worry aashi, he will come because i saw that in his eyes. But we have to plans and make all set of questions that we need to ask to him clearly. No confusions and no making him doubt on us.

Aashi: Am with you bhaiyu, whatever you tell i will follow it. By the way if we find papa wants to meet mamma then?

Aansh: We will make him meet her and make sure mamma is fine. Also we should be careful with mamma aashi. Her one look on us, she will know we are doing something behind her back. Be careful chotti.

Aashi: Dont worry ASR even am one so i will be careful went comes to mamma and papa.

So shall we go now? We have lot to do and we don’t have time.

Aansh: Sure!! So our game starts here!!

Mumma aur papaa  ka meeting and our hide seek!!

To be continued…..


Chapter 3- The Meet (Life without her)

The sun rose in the east at 5:30am but arnav was already in his Black suit looking ever dashing after days and was sitting in front of his all time wifey (laptop of course) and checking out the address that aman has sent him yesterday. The previous night was the torturous night for him in his existence. The wait never ended and till its just going to be 6:00 is in it?

When will the school start? he started thinking about it May be by 8 so he has to be there before that. he ordered a black coffee and started sipping it slowly dwelling into memories after his wife left him or say he abandoned her in the mandap and came late to find her missing.

He was all alone day and night in the confines of their room which were dark totally without any light. His ray of hope long gone. There were days when he will deny eating and how his sister will threaten and pleased him to eat and wont be successful half the time. There were days when he will be fully surviving in saline water alone, Trips would go on and on and on that he even forgot to chew when anji di would feed him rarely. It took him an year or more to pick up all his confidence and courage that there is something called hope too. He long forgotten that until one day when his di came up with the idea of detectives, he almost fought with her for an hour to not arrange for detective as kushi will not like that, didn’t she tell not to search, She forgot to even mention his name even in that small piece of parchment. All because of him, as he came late.

Then Di convinced him telling that may be kushi knows he will search for her even if she said not to, that’s why she didn’t mention anything about her. He remembered anji’s exact word “May be she still had hope in her Love chote, that’s why she didn’t mention about you, What if she is waiting for you to find her? Will your disappoint her? Leave her chote, will you live your whole life like this chote? Wont you search for her?” This made him think, He was not “The ASR” who never like to lose. Usually, he will get things done in his way then what happened to him suddenly? On that day he decided he will bring her back in his life what ever the current situation will be. For that he has to become the same ASR, but definitely not the arrogant cold ASR. He will be a different man totally.He will be like how kushi wanted him to be.

From that day on the search started. “The Real Search”. Also he went back to the normal life, the life without any color’s, the mechanical life, like a machine. It took him seven years to find her, He has searched her every corner of Delhi and Lucknow thinking that he will find her but he didn’t know she would have traveled this far, all alone. He was scared for her day and night. He used to talk to mom in the night and ask her to keep his kushi safe and sound. That he will pray for her happiness daily and also will ask his mom to help him in find to her soon as he doesn’t want to go back to that world again ever.

Back to present,

He started at the clock in the wall and it read 7:30am, seeing that he rushed out of the house. He reached ten minutes later  and saw students already pouring into the school. He waited for her, thinking may be she is teaching in the school and that’s why aman has given him this address. He waited as the bell rang and the school started, He somehow know that he has missed her in the morning, he was about to shout at the detectives for giving him some wrong address and suddenly realized something. What if she has to come to school early in the morning and that’s why he didn’t see her may be he has see her in the evening. So he decided that he will not call anyone till evening.

He spent the whole day roaming around the school itself.He learnt about various shops that are nearby and also that there is a staff quarters of the school nearby. He found out that it will take him some 20 to 25 minutes only to reach this place from his home even if he have to walk. he went through many roads wandering aimlessly and had lunch in a near by small restaurant attached to a coffee cafe. Every ten minutes once he made sure he reached the school entrance and checked for anything different!! but nothing of that sort happened.

He happened to see a park near by the school, actually in the backside of the school. The place has totally mesmerized him in a single day. He has almost has memorized this place too. The school seems to be big in the of the road where the slope of the hill started. There was many small small villa like houses surrounding school which were named staff quartos, there were roads on the opposite side of the entrance that will lead to the main road where all the shops were there. Apart from those shops there were few other shops in this lane too. people were seem to be nice too and polite. He simply loved this calm serene and natural place he decided. it has its own aura that no one can describe in words. The feeling about the nature was something wordless and awesome, that’s what his mind told. By afternoon he was almost sure that kushi lived her because the nature was like her. So calm and soothing and this place kushi will love so he became impatient as his wait in the front gate started again.

He heard a bell ringing in a distance inside the school as he stood infront of the school address that aman gave him. He came here in the morning and still he couldn’t get a glimpse of her. As the wait prolonged his irritation started to flare up. So he decided to go and check inside the school himself as he was losing his hope.

He got down his vehicle and tool out his coolers out and stared at the name of the school for some good 5 minutes and he started to approach the gate.

On the other hand there were two cute little kids who where locking their books and test notes and all their other belongings that is not needed at home inside their cupboard before they leave. They are the most lovable studious and sweet kids that every parent would wish to have. They are kids in many ways yet totally matured ones. All the parents and teachers love them as they see these two kids. they are know that ansh is a very serious kid while aashi is both serious and bubbly, just like her mother.

Ansh:  Chotti, make it fast how long will you take to lock your cupboard? I know its friday today and tomo is weekend that’s doesn’t mean you shouldn’t read. So i just request you to bring your maths and science book. Don’t tell me tomo that you left it in your cupboard.

Aashi: Ufffo!!! Bhaiyya ek minute please. Sab mujhe pata hai. bus aati hi hoon. you stand in the entrance of our class, i will come soon. See whether mama is searching for us.

Aansh: Chooti mumma will be worried. yeah even i hope that she doesn’t come out of the staff room in search of us. Before she panic we have to reach here so make it fast.

Aashi: Haan haan aati hoon,

Saying this she loced the cupboard and hung that key around her neck and ran out of her class to collide into a wall and fell down.

Aansh was enraged just by seeing this scene.

Actually he saw a man walking along the corridor turning back and front, but he didn’t see his face as he was so tall for him and also he was looking for his mother. On the other hand, Aashi was confused that there was no wall here a moment before but how come all of a sudden she was hit by one? That’s when she heard his bro calling out to someone, to whose leg she collided.

Aansh: Hello sir can’t you see and walk? you can very well see my sister’s didnt see you right? what was the need to turn back and walk?

Arnav turned to aansh side with the typical “What the” expression. At the same time Aashi lifted her head to loo at the man’s face.

Realization dawned in aansh face as he looked at arnav’s and he turned to look at his sister who was staring at the man in front of them with mouth open in a typical “O” and eyes as wide as his mom’s.

Arnav saw both the girls and the boys expression but what shocked him most was the girls expression. The thought automatically came in his mind  “Just like his kushi”.


To continue soon




Chapter 3- MEET

Hey friends,

Update on its way this saturday may be

Stay tuned!!


I will update next two parts soon and will take a long break for my exams again. Please comment as i send mails for some 200 and not even 20 comment  😦 Feeling bad for that!!

This time planning to mail tomo after i update the rest two too. since i promised there will be one today i updated it now!



Precap Chapter 3:

He heard a bell ringing in a distance inside the school as he stood infront of the school address that aman gave him. He came here in the morning and still he couldn’t get a glimpse of her. 

He was wondering whether the detective’s were trying to foo, them around or what as he ca see no sight of his kushi anywhere.

He saw parents going through the gate and thought of going inside and checking.



Aansh: Chotti, make it fast how long will you take to lock your cupboard?

Aashi: Bhaiyya ek minute please.

Aansh: Chooti mumma will be worried. We have to go before she comes out of the staff room in search of her so please.

Aashi: Haan haan aati hoon,

Aashi turned to collide herself to a wall and fell down.

She confused that there was not a wall here a moment before but how come all of a sudden she was hit by one?

She heard his bro calling out.

Aansh: Hello sir can’t you see and walk? you can verywell see my sister’s back faing you right?

Arnav: Turned to aansh side with the typical What the expression.

Realization dawned in aansh face as he looked at arnav’s and he turned to look at his sister who was staring at the man in front of them!

Chapter 2-C-Life without het

Whole family reached Lucknow in no time  and the last rites of shashi was over. Now the whole Gupta’s and Raizada’s have been sitting inside the old broken building called Gomati sadan all silent. Without uttering a single word to each other and whole building seems to be lifeless.

It was arnav who opened the mouth,

Arnav: Akash i want the entire details, How all this happened? where did kushi go?

Akash: Bhai these people didn’t wanted to go in the chopper that i arranged for them and they wanted to go in train only so i got the ticket for them and took them, kushiji came with us only bhai, I don’t know when she left or where, morning when i opened my eyes to check for everyone, she was not there in her place, and i searched the whole place and couldn’t find her, when shashiji heard it he went all pale and he had a attack bhai, we couldn’t save him.

Arnav: This is not done akash, How can you be so careless? how can you answer me like this? you should be so careful and kushi where will i find her? she is my wife dammit…

Buaji: Nahi beta, Woh aapiki patni nahi hai, aapnae usse abi thak shaadi nahi kiya, agar appko yaad hai to appko patha hai ki aap mandap mei nahi aayi thi aur….

Arnav: ENOUGH……!!!! You don’t have to remind me that buaji, i know i didn’t turn up and if am right i know you all know why i didn’t turn up too, But do you know what i went through? did any of you asked me  where i was or what was on my mind or anything like that?

Nani: Since when on we are allowed to ask questions to THE ASR, Chotte? Humko maaulam nahi, agar hua hota tho hum hi pooch lathe, care, ab puch tha hoon kahan they aap? aur subhadra ne aakar humme kyun kaha ki aap nahi aaogi? Aur……

Arnav: I will answer your question’s now but before that i have something to do nani give me some minutes.

Arnav called aman and said to trace kushi by any means in his always harsh tone (else you will be fired) and kept the call, thats when akash said

Akash: Bhai woh wo…..

Arnav: Don’t swallow the words dammit, spit it out.

Akash: Bhai there was a small paper that kushiji left before  leaving us and in it, it was just return that “Don’t search me amma, babuji and buaji”.

Heartbeat stopped hearing those words from akash.

Everything blurred in that one second and he went all numb and dumb the next minute. It took one month for him to comeback to senses. He was totally in shock for days together and when he opened his eyes he was in RM in his bed.A lady in white and white was sitting near him, the moment he opened his eyes she called out for everyone

All the members from raizada house came running into his room at the same time.

Nani: This was not my chotte, chotte we knew,  please chote open up to us!! why have you been like this please chotte!! say something to us please!!

and with that arnav started crying which not a single soul has seen before, Anjali at that moment saw a 14 year old kid that was hidden nicely in the arrogant and angry facade.

For the first time in life everyone saw a vulnerable arnav, a lost kid and poor man who till date has always showed a rigid face, a grumpy nature and an arrogant character.

Anji slowly made everyone move out and she stayed behind her chotte that night fully, beside him and infact was like a mother to him.

She decided in those painful moments to take charge in life, she for the first time in life was very guilty infact so guilty for making a child to take her responsibility too, she was sick of herself to kill a kid in her chotte and made him lift all the burden in his life and also her who was all hiding herself in a fake world from the past!! Fake world of love!! this last one month when Arnav was in coma made her realize many things!! One about her most devoted and lovable husband who is nothing but a leech trying to suck the life and happiness out of you. She realized his half lie’s and all the truth’s about him as days started moving after they came back from gupta’s. The head was the house was lying the bed almost dead and lifeless and the snake had all the mercy of looting raizada’s without THE ARNAV SINGH RAIZADA to watch around but what he forgot about was that there where mami’s eagle eyes and nk awareness that is there always around him, following him like a shadow. NK was already aware of him through kushi and always kept an eye on him.

Finally one day anji came in straight with the truth when her good for nothing husband was trying to kill her own chotte. All credits of getting him caught red handed was mami’s brain and nk’s help for her. Then later on when anji confronted him he told every single truth that has actually happened and how arnav and kushi has become victim’s!! Anji could see all the lust for kushi in his eyes. On that exact moment she took a decision of handing him over to the police, to which he started laughing madly and telling her that there in no proof against him and he will loot all the money and find his kushiji and be with her. Look at the audacity of that stupid spineless man, thats what nk was thinking and he silently called the police and handed him over to the police. As always the lawyer brain of shyam manohar jha worked over time and planned for an escape but nk showed the video recorded by him when shyam was confessing his deeds to all of them and helped the police in providing a strongest truth which can never be dodged even by shyam.

Anjali being anjali singh raizada too applied for a divorce even though she died the moment she heard her loving husband confessing the truth through his own mouth! it took all the thing that she had not to breakdown in front of the family members and be strong for them. She turned all her focus and concern on chotte who was the soul reason for her life from now on!! It took all that she had to come out of the depression!! Infact the love sick anji died the moment she saw her husband trying to kill her chotte! now she was just anji and she is breathing just for her brother who has sacrificed his life just for the sake of her happiness!!!

Nothing else will matter to her from now on!! All that matters for her is her chotte and her family!! but one thing that made her different from her brother was she still didn’t lose her faith on her devimaiyya!! she still have a hope that one day she will be happy with her family and her brother beside him to pamper her again!! with the snake being safe in its cage of life time imprisonment, Akash being a brother of arnav made sure that shyam never accessed anyone to come out of the jail! he made sure that he rot in the jail for the whole life time!!

She was reeling in the past when she heard him crying due to the nightmares, she saw him  withering in pain on seeing those things on his dreams. she thought her chotte was strong but it was all a fake.. Out right lie or should she say that they were all blind. She can now very well she what he was going through.

She tried to pacify him and bring him out of his nightmare. Arnav was sweating badly and was panting like anything when he heard his sister’s voice reaching his ear’s very slowly and feebly. Slowly he opened his eyes to look at her and the next moment her hugged her and cried and dozed off on her shoulder’s again. Arnav POV: ” all he could think was she left him alone like his mom and doesn’t want to come back to him”

Anji (Thinking): I will bring you back chotte. Thats  a promise. A sister’s promise.

Arnav opened to see a dark room around him and realized to be night already. He was thinking all his past as told by his sister to him. As in how she brought a psychiatrist to him for counselling, How slowly he started to respond to her and how she made him start working for AR and how she asked about appointing detectives. He is so happy to see his sister like this yet he can be sure that she is not the sister he intended to see. This lady infront of him is strong outside but weak inside. She may put a good show to everyone but not to him, he has seen her lost eyes, lifeless soul. One more thing for standing here is just for his sister, he doesn’t want her to lose hope again on life.

Now he has come to shimla with a mission, A mission of getting his kushi back or say to get his family’s kushi back and he will get it. He is not Arnav singh raizada for nothing and he will do it!

His mobile beeped.

A new msg:

From: AMAN Time:10:56pm

St Thomas church school,

57/9 third lane, MG road


Sir this is the school address. Hope you are fine.

In these years he found a very good friend in Aman and that’s what he is. He replied aman a thanks and his wishes. He had his dinner and went to his bed with all the hope’s of sun rising in his world after 8 long years

To be continued..